VIDEO REVIEW: Hercules in the Haunted World

i SPY EUROSPY: Agent 3S3 Massacre in the Sun

Agent 3S3: Massacre in the Sun
Director: Sergio Sollima
Year 1966
 
Agent 3S3: Massacre in the Sun, AKA Hunter From the Unknown, is an average yet obscure Eurospy entry that is kept interesting by its varied and diverse cast of actors and its tendency to stage some entertaining action sequences with engagingly strange situations. Carried by the capable actions of its star George Ardisson, the film makes for a fun but unusual viewing experience. With its beautiful locations, intriguing gadgets, and stunning female cast, Massacre in the Sun may not be the best of the genre, but it’s still a thrilling entry that will put a smile on your face.
 
The film follows Agent 3S3 as he is assigned to travel to the city of San Felipe, a small Caribbean island, in order to search for a missing fellow spy, Agent 3S4. Agent 3S4’s recent disappearance has something to do with a mad scientist who is experimenting with some form of lethal gas, under the watchful eye of a dictator and a nefarious organization. Hot on the heels of 3S3 is a slew of secret agents all representing their countries and their nation’s best interests, and each one of them has a plethora of tricks and disguises up their sleeve in order to complete their individual missions. Like a powder keg ready to burst, the island of San Felipe is about to erupt as all of these warring factions prepare to clash in a cacophony of explosions and gunfire. Who will be left standing! Who cares?!?! This shit is FUN!

George Ardisson takes on the role of Agent 3S3, otherwise known as Walter Ross, a highly capable spy who often finds himself in hot water. Ardisson shines in the role and although he isn’t as debonair as some of his more notable Eurospy agent peers, he always puts on a splendid show and manages to entertain to no end. In Massacre in the Sun, George has ample opportunities to showcase his athletic abilities as well as that sly and dry banter that he’s known for, resulting in a performance that truly ups the fun factor of the picture to respectable levels. With this being my second foray into the spy world of George Ardisson, with my first being Countdown to Doomsday, I can safely say that I’m looking forward to hunting down his other two efforts Passport to Hell and Operation Counterspy.
 
Along for the ride are a handful of wacky characters that help fill out the weird espionage-filled world of Massacre in the Sun. Frank Wolff plays the role of Ivan Tereczkov, a Russian agent who clashes with Ardisson’s Agent Ross a number of times over the course of the film. Wolff does a great job with the role, often injecting a great deal of mischievous nature into his character which gives way to all sorts of trouble for 3S3 when he begins to play mind games with our clueless hero. I've always enjoyed Frank's screen presence and he's a favorite of mine in the Giallo film Death Walks on High Heels. Another arduous miscreant that manages to be a thorn in the side of Agent Ross is the villainous Signora Barrientos, played by the fiery Luz Marquez, who can’t help but fall for the charismatic spy even though he threatens to topple her organization and ruin her plans. Luz is both sexy and fierce in this film and her inclusion is a definite plus in my book. Last but definitely not the least of 3S3’s antagonists is the masochistic Radek, played by Michel Lemoine. With a hot temper and penchant for violence, Radek makes for one perfectly diabolical villain for Ross to go toe to toe with and Lemoine is devilishly good in the role.

Aside from the multitude of bad guys in the story, Agent 3S3 also finds a few friendly faces amidst the mayhem, the most beautiful of them being the stunning Greek actress Evi Marandi, who takes on the role of UK agent Melissa. Looking absolutely breathtaking as the femme fatale, Evi definitely increases the amount of intrigue in the film whenever she appears on screen, and it also doesn’t hurt that her character takes on an interesting duel role within the story. Another standout ally of Agent 3S3 is the unlikely General Siqueiros, played by the bombastic Fernando Sancho. His character is rather unusual, because at first we are introduced to him as being the main villain of the piece but after some deliberation we come to find that he is weary of the organization that is behind the experimentation of lethal gas and is looking to jump sides for the time being. This character turn is not the only attention-grabbing thing about the General, because in entertaining Bond-villain style, Siqueiros has a secret hideaway filled with beautiful women who inhabit a multi-themed palace full of physical and visual delights. Luz lives it up as the diabolical dictator with a sudden change of heart, and his verbose performance must be seen to be believed.
 
With a robust cast such as this, you would imagine that a great deal of crazy antics would cultivate from the mixture of such zany performers, and you’d be right. Within the runtime of this film we see Agent 3S3 electrocuted in a swimming pool, perform one hell of a spanking on a sexy and naughty villainous, take on a dojo filled with stick-wielding fighters, gun down an entire army while sporting some nifty night vision goggles, and pretty much save the day whenever the time comes for it. Now don’t get me wrong, while all of these things are fantastic and totally align with the outlandish nature of Eurospy films, there are a few glaring hiccups in the formula. For instance, you won’t really know what’s going on for the majority of the film. While some might see this as a huge hindrance to the validity of the movie, the inclusion of all of these wacky moments and characters allow me to overlook the vagueness of the plot and just sit back and bask in the absurdity of it all. Plus, George Ardisson is just so enjoyable as Agent 3S3 that you can forgive the film’s missteps and just watch the man do his thing. It may not be logically sound, but this Eurospy is a hell of a good time.

Agent 3S3: Massacre in the Sun is an obscure gem of the genre, which may not win any awards for being the most concise and coherent spy yarn, it still manages to pull out the goods in its quest to entertain and thrill. George Ardisson brings an air of respect to the film and his portrayal as the titular agent is eye-catching and especially thorough. The same can be said for Evi Marandi as the sexy undercover agent, who often steals each scene she’s in with her alluring beauty.
 
On top of that, the performances across the board by the rest of the cast bring about an air of strangeness that just seems to permeate the narrative in the most fascinating of ways. From the many character twists that crop up within the film’s runtime, to the abundance of action moments, to the over the top nature of everyone on board, the film has a habit of grabbing your attention and introducing you to the next madcap set of sequences before literally pulling the rug out from under you in the most unsuspecting of ways. With a narrative flow that just doesn’t quite conform to a logical structure and a cast of characters that more than make up for that lax of presentation, Agent 3S3: Massacre in the Sun is truly a unique beast. Even with its shortcomings, the film is an entertaining ride that I’m looking forward to tackling again when I need that overwhelming fix of the absurd. This movie is…..

First one to spit on a pedestrian's head gets a free lunch on the loser.

Why don't you get up and I'll show you just how well I handle a stick.

Looks like George and his invisible date are having a blast.

Give me that mustache or I'll stick ya!

HOLY SHIT!

Good.... Bad.... I'm the hombre with the gun.

I know you're stupidly looking at the back of my head again Carl!

Looks like George likes the hands on approach to acting. You little pervert!

Shit! Weeeeeeeee!

How many times do I have to tell you. Stop stepping in dog shit!

Look at my mustache when I'm talking to you bro.

Evi's got something up her sexy sleeve.

So what do you think of my oversized gun?

This chicks got the POWER!

Please stop fiddling with that you old bat!

What the hell is going on?!?!?!

Scuba Steve finally snaps!

We're about to do it, so could you please turn the channel?

See ya later assholes!

 

i SPY EUROSPY: Countdown to Doomsday

Countdown to Doomsday
Director: Marcello Baldi
Year 1966
 
Countdown to Doomsday is an overdramatically titled entry in the Eurospy cannon of films, that though misleading is one fine and entertaining example of the genre. Unlike the bombastic American title, the film is more grounded in reality, replacing the imagined scenario of the world ending with the threat of an oil company’s rig pegged for terroristic threats. Either way the end result is a blast to see play out.
 
With the images of doomsday aside, the film follows private eye/secret agent Jeff Milton, or Jeff Merlin as he was called in my copy of the movie, after he is hired to a kidnapping case. An unknown group has abducted an oil baron’s daughter in order to get a hefty ransom for an early retirement and the scared shitless father spares no expense on bringing the best man for the job on board. With a shit eating grin, Merlin explores the underbelly of Caracas in order to put the hurt on the kidnappers who coincidentally are mixed up in a drug ring that is also under surveillance by a small group of undercover agents. Eventually Merlin and the agents join forces in bringing down the bad guys, but can they save the beautiful young kidnapped woman before it’s too late? The countdown has begun.

The film stars George Ardisson in the role of Jeff Merlin. He’s a private eye who just so happens to do an amazing job in disguising himself as a secret agent. He does this so well, that you’d be hard pressed to even know that he was a lowly private investigator unless it was explained to you in the opening moments of the film. On screen he is a super agent through and through, going through all the clichés and visual cues that come with the title. Merlin is a pretty capable agent too, thanks to Ardisson’s athletic frame and the ability to deal out some pretty nasty death blows when pushed to the limit. There are moments when he almost comes off as incompetent at his job though, seeing that he is captured almost every time he has an encounter with a group of bad guys, forcing him to escape in some way shape or form. It makes for some thrilling moments, but ultimately you’ll find yourself yelling at the screen for Merlin to step his game up and stop falling into the hands of the enemy so easily. It’s still fun as all hell, because of the great Eurospy elements that come from his underachieving antics.
 
Of course we can’t have a film that follows the Eurospy formula so closely without having a number of beautiful women to fill up the screen. We have that in spades with this entry, but the real standout among the female cast of cuties is the character of Florence, played by the stunning Pascale Audret. She looks absolutely amazing in this film and you can see why Merlin takes a shine to her early on in the movie. Unfortunately her role, though substantial, is summed up as more of a damsel in distress situation where she is just included for Merlin to be able to come and save the day. It works in the film, but I just wish she had a more compelling role in the story and pulled off a few femme fatale moves alongside Merlin. Oh well, she does look amazing in the film and I’m just glad I was able to blindly stumble across just a portion of her filmography.

When it comes to action and espionage, Countdown to Doomsday has you covered. There’s a great deal of instances where we get to see spies being spies, like when undercover agent Alan Shepperton, played by Harald Leipnitz, is trying to figure out if the good Dr. Soarez is actually a double agent working for the other team. His ingenious set up of the doctor and the perfect reveal of his allegiance is a thrill to see play out and to top it all off, it’s smartly acted and masterfully done.
 
The action is also another aspect of the film that stands out. George Ardisson showcases some pretty nifty moves during the plethora of his fight scenes and each one is as entertaining as the next. He truly comes off as deadly and dangerous, after we’re witness to him chocking the life out of a man while driving a car and harpooning another guy through the heart. The guy is pretty badass when he isn’t getting himself caught. Ardisson is definitely a man to look out for in the spy genre and I’m going to make it a priority to hunt down the rest of his efforts. When it comes to Countdown to Doomsday, it looks to be a pretty good representation on what Ardisson can bring to the genre and I’m highly optimistic about his other roles. 

Countdown to Doomsday is a perfect example of the genre, having all the essential elements that make a Eurospy a Eurospy. George Ardisson as the butt-kicking agent type character Jeff Merlin, is a great addition to the historic number of secret agents that have graced the genre. His demeanor is unique and his character is void of cocky one-liners and smart ass remarks, which is a refreshing change of pace for films of this ilk. Pascale Audret is also a significant asset to the enjoyability of this flick, looking absolutely ravishing in her role that is unfortunately used for nothing more then a springboard into showcasing Ardisson’s athletic skill and prowess.
 
From its action set pieces to its espionage filled moments, Countdown to Doomsday is a great example of the genre of Eurospy, giving us all the elements of this fantastic subject of cinematic wonders to satisfy any lover of this twisted spy subgenre. Doomsday it may not be, but it sure is an entertaining……

The names Merlin... and yes... I'm Magical.

So what are you wearing? A towel? Sexy!

I think Merlin gets the point.

Pretty hot under these lights? Huh Seinfeld?

Nobody points a gun at the lovely Florence. Merlin where are you?!?!

Alright... Now do the hokey pokey and turn yourself around.

Well hello there hot stuff.

You're really dreamy Merlin.

So what are you wearing? A plaid shirt? Sexy!

And he's down for the count!

Young lady! Did you just grab my buttocks?

Get up you big cry baby.

Tragedy suddenly struck when Merlin dropped his ice cream cone.

You disgust me! When was the last time you cleaned your ears out?

Alright, kidney.... lower pocket.

The perfect cliched ending. Love it!

REVIEW: Hercules in the Haunted World

Hercules in the Haunted World
Director: Mario Bava
Year 1961

Hercules in the Haunted World is a visually intense Peplum that relishes in the vibrant and fantasy infused colors, concocted by the one and only Mario Bava. The film centers around two muscle bound characters, Hercules and Theseus, as they venture into the underworld in order to awaken Hercules' love Princess Deianira from a hypnotic trance that threatens to claim her life and strip her of the throne. Can Hercules and Theseus survive the horrors of the underworld, or will their good intentions unleash something far more disastrous unto the world? Either way be prepared for a wild ride.

See they're laughing, they're having a good time.

Fantastically directed by Mario Bava, the legendary italian director most known for his iconic horror films like Black Sunday, The Whip and the Body, Black Sabbath, Kill Baby, Kill, and Blood and Black Lace, Hercules in the Haunted World showcases a plethora of mythological elements all fabricated and bathed under a kaleidoscope of colors. Filmed to perfection by the accomplished italian filmmaker, it's hard to imagine what the film would have looked like in any other directors hands. It's safe to say that Bava had a style all of his own and he let that splendid eye for imagery dictate the atmosphere of Hercules world, both in the realm of the living and the world of the dead.

The striking distinction between the two habitats is like night and day, but he still manages to balance both locations enabling the cast of characters to feel at home in both worlds no matter how diverse the living situations. It's classically done and even though we are bombarded with some rather supernatural and fanciful things, we never feel out of place in this euphoric plain, making it all the more clearer that Bava is what makes this film truly unique and a beast of its own.

Christopher Lee, you naughty little monkey.

Of course Bava had a great deal of help from his cast, first and foremost Reg Park as Hercules. Not only did he have the physique for the role, but he also carried a great deal of charisma that helped mold him into a more sympathetic character. What could have been a hollow, muscle-bound, and wooden performance, is instead transformed into a conscious and selfless representation of Hercules by Mr. Park. I really enjoyed his interpretation of the larger then life character and I felt that he gave the role a certain amount of weight that might not have been present if someone else had taken the reigns. Watching as the goliath Hercules struggles with moral decisions while at the same time battle with such determination through the terrors of the underworld, made for a highly entertaining ride that was a whole hell of a lot of fun. Reg Park was able to tackles both sides of the coin and should be commended for such a feat.

Everyone loves Hercules.

God I hate this haunted world.

Also the role of Theseus, Hercules' companion, brought another yet different quality to the film. More of a womanizer and scoundrel, George Ardisson's Theseus provided more of a mischievous nature to the story. When we first meet Theseus, he is literally rolling in the hay with a recently unengaged woman without a care in the world, that is until he is ambushed by a group of men hired to take out both himself and Hercules. With a great deal of show Theseus thwarts the attack, sending his assailants crashing to the ground as he seems to thrive on the action of the moment. Ardisson almost plays him as an action junky, always looking for his next test of strength or conquest in both the battlefield and the bedroom. He makes for the perfect partner to Hercules, who is more of a focused warrior only looking for a resolution to the problem and never seeking it out for the sheer thrill of it.

The undeniable contrasts of Theseus' passion for the spontaneous and Hercules' sensible approach to both love and life, comes crashing to a head in the second half of the film, providing a very memorable moment between the two friends. Ardisson's role in portraying that other half of the friendship is key to making it believable to the audience. The energy he brought to the role matches the passion that flows through Theseus' veins and that's really all you can ask in such an important supporting character and actor.

Last one up is a monkey's uncle!

I'm getting to old for this shit.

The antagonist for this fearsome duo is a power hungry and deceptive man named King Lico, played by the one and only Christopher Lee. Blinded by his lust for power, Lico entraps his niece in a hypnotic stupor, thwarting her from taking the throne and ruling the kingdom. As usual Lee is wonderful, giving that subtle yet overpowering performance that has permeated throughout his career and created more memorable characters then one can count. His presence is always intense and he carries it beautifully, leaving the viewer with a foreboding notion that this man is a walking talking poison guided only by his quest for the throne. I loved every minute he was on the screen, including his final confrontation with Hercules as they battle on top of a mist covered and moonlit hilltop ruin. The sequence is mesmerizing and it beautifully caps off this wonderful film.

You want me to do what?!?!

Oh Hercules... I can't stay mad at you.

The real meat and potatoes of this film is in the exquisite set design and model work. Never has the world of the underworld been so haunting and vividly reconstructed, capturing that creepy atmosphere and archaic wonder that really propels this film above and beyond its fellow Peplum companions. It's such a vivid portrayal too that one can't help but get swept up in the fantasy of it all. From the gnarled and twisted tree that Hercules has to scale, to the blood vine forest, to the lava filled caverns of the underworld, this film really does pack a visual punch. Even outside of the haunted realm of the underworld, Bava manages to spruce up the color and make it visually pleasing.

This is most prevalent during the night time scenes where we are given a surreal color scheme of purples, greens, and blues, that light the corridors and pillars of the palace. It's the most unnatural look one could imagine, but placed within the context of Bava's already established world, it works and works wonders. If there's one thing you can say and come away with, it's that this film is one of the most visually striking Peplums to ever be created.

Where in the hell am I?

I have the POWER!!!!

Hercules in the Haunted World is an imaginative film full of wonderful sets, glorious imagery, and interesting characters. The world is alive and full of life, made in part by the awe-inspiring design of the production team and the always appreciated cinematography of Mario Bava. Reg Park incapsulates the heart and soul of Hercules, giving the character a larger range then most give the icon credit for, while George Ardisson thrives as Theseus. To top it off you have the always consistent and highly engaging Christopher Lee as the main villain, who absolutely elevates the severity of Hercules' quest. All in all this film showcases the epitome of Peplum films, giving us the familiar staples of the genre, but adding a little twist to the proceedings that breathes new life into the formula. I highly recommend this film to Peplum fans and any followers of the late great italian master Mario Bava. 

5 out of 5 stars       Mario Bava's Peplum Masterpiece!