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i SPY EUROSPY: Le monocle rit jaune

Le monocle rit jaune

Director: Georges Lautner

Year 1964

Le monocle rit jaune, AKA The Monocle, is a beautifully filmed and exceptionally silly Eurospy production, which makes outstanding use of its picturesque locations and stark photography. Delving deep into farcical territory and relishing every minute of it, this unusual espionage outing doesn't shy away from the more outlandish elements of the genre, yet embraces it with open arms. Centralized over its eccentric main character and the wacky antics that he gets himself into, The Monocle is without a doubt an exceedingly unique spy entry, one that allows the fun to take over the proceedings and never let go.

It appears that a gang of Asian terrorists have mounted a destructive campaign against world factions who are conducting nuclear research and it is up to French agent Major Theobald Dromard, AKA The Monocle, to bring the bad guys to justice. Flying into Hong Kong, it is up to Dromard, his trusty side kick Poussin, and a handful of unlikely allies, to stop the terrorists and keep safe an American nuclear aircraft carrier that just so happens to be coming into port. With time quickly running out and no trails to follow, can Dromard track down the culprits amidst this clashing of cultures?

Paul Meurisse takes on the role of Theobald Dromard, the unorthodox secret agent who always seems to come out on top. This is the third time that Meurisse has donned the role and I must say that it seems at this point that he really owns the character. I've unfortunately never had the chance to see his previous efforts with the role, but from what I've witnessed in The Monocle, I've made it a priority to hunt down the other two films. His interpretation of a secret agent is as loopy as they come, and it is in this parody infused approach that makes his performance so enjoyable. His actions, smart quips, and running commentary are wildly off the wall and most often entirely off the subject. He even has his own unique way of firing his gun, which proves hilariously to be one hundred percent effective in even the most improbable situations. Meurisse's contributions to the film and the character are among the productions most valuable and effective assets, and it is one that is never left untapped.

Aside from Dromard, the film is also brimming with other interesting and unusual characters. Robert Dalban plays the trusty assistant Poussin, who's hardened looks and drab personality make for a contrasting presence against Dromard's more light heartened nature. Olivier Despax also contributes to the film as Frederic, the young associate who's itching for a piece of the action. As for the feminine touch of the film, the bragging rights go to the legendary horror queen Barbara Steele who portrays the lovely and mysterious Valerie. To my knowledge this is the only spy feature that Steele has been involved in, and I must say it was a nice and unexpected surprise, for the genre suits her. Rounding out the rest of the cast is an assortment of wacky characters that come and go like the wind, but always leave a lasting impression on the overall outlandish nature of the film.

The locations of Hong Kong and Macao are expertly lensed by director Georges Lautner, who also happened to film the first two Monocle entries starring Paul Meurisse. His eye for beautiful imagery is put to the test, as we are given some breathtaking views of this exotic and magical land. Each and every frame is composed with unbridled care, giving a stark contrast against the carefree nature of the film and its characters. The stand out locations of the movie have got to be the harbor scenes, the bustling streets of Hong Kong, and the rundown chapel on top of a hill where Dromard has a most exciting shoot out. In all of these instances the black and white photography shines, making for a fun film that is easy on the eyes and picturesquely perfect.

As for the wacky antics of the film, the moments are aplenty. Dromard's shooting skills for starters are a trip, as he takes on multiple bad guys with ease, even going as far as to taking out two henchmen with one bullet. The guy is a wonder! There is also a completely unforgettable sequence that shows Dromard and friends being attacked by a group of Hong Kong gangsters and a restaurant, who proceed to pull off a dance number in slow motion like they just jumped straight out of West Side Story. It's unbelievably random and completely out of place, but the strangeness of the moment is just so remarkably hypnotizing that it simply feels right. There are a number of instances in the film that capture this kind of magically obscure wonder, and for that alone I highly recommend it. It is a film that is hard to categorize, because it straddles such an odd line between action/espionage and comedy, but it is an unusual concoction that is so unbelievably watchable.

Le monocle rit jaune is a sensationally fun flick that essentially predates the typical Eurospy movie, yet seems to be the stepping stone for what the genre would eventually become in its later years. Entertaining, lighthearted, and full of surprising action, The Monocle is without a doubt a wacky sort of film, one that wears its heart on its sleeve and never apologizes for it. From its beautiful photography and its classic black and white imagery, it's not easy to dismiss the production's visionary prowess.

Paul Meurisse gives an outstanding performance as the comical secret agent Theobald Dromard and his eccentric mannerisms and essential screen presence is a valued asset to the movie's lasting appeal. The same can be said for Robert Dalban, Barbara Steele, and the rest of the cast, as they all bring in outstandingly succinct performances that cater to their various strengths. Essentially it is the film's incessant nature to go against the grain and never tread familiar ground that really makes it such an enjoyable ride. There is always something that happens in the story that spins you for a loop, making you question what will happen next. It is the spontaneous personality of the movie that really makes it a special gem, and it is an aspect of the production that is wholly embraced by its film crew. Unique and unbridled to the last, The Monocle is a film that engages the viewer in multiple ways, yet it always is focused on putting on one hell of an entertaining show. Le monocle rit jaune is.....

Will you guys stop talking! Some people are trying to watch the movie!

Looks like someone is ready to get their Barbara Steele autograph.

How about no smoking in my car A-hole.

No one was impressed with his ceramic pottery making skills.

It's raining men! Hallelujah it's raining men!

Weeeeeeee!!!!!

That's right! You woo the shit out of her Dromard!

You chumps got a staring problem?

Paul Meurisse looks like he just stepped off the set of a biblical epic.

How dare you read such smut in front of Barbara Steele!

The name's Dromard.... Theobald Dromard.

And so the dance battle begins.... I shit you not!

I think I forgot to turn off the oven.

She totally pulls off the Jambi look.

Reservoir Dogs eat your heart out!

This show is hilarious! See! This guy likes it!

Don't mess with Mr. Peanut and his posse.

I'm turning Chinese, I think I'm turning Chinese... I really think so!

REVIEW: Wonder Women

Wonder Women

Director: Robert Vincent O'Neill

Year 1973

Wonder Women is a fantastic spy-centric 70's gem which takes all of the fun aspects of the espionage genre from the mid sixties and mixes it all up into a ridiculously fun exploitation flick that often boggles the mind. Filled to the brim with sexy kung-fu women, dangerous thugs and exotic locations, the film goes all out in displaying its outlandish heart on its sleeve. Lensed in the Philippines and comprised of an international cast, Wonder Women is a lost gem of a feature, which surprises at every turn, often taking the viewer into unfathomable situations that serve to entertain exponentially.

The film follows insurance investigator, and all around badass, Mike Harber, as he is assigned to a most unusual case. It turns out that the world's greatest athletes have been disappearing in startling succession and all signs point to a mysterious organization off the coast of Manila. Run by a brilliantly mad surgeon named Dr. Tsu, the all female group has been experimenting with body transplants which require them to abduct famous athletes in order to sell their body parts to the highest bidder. Racing against time, Mike Harber begins a harrowing search for the most recent missing athlete, but his investigation won't be easy. Crooked con-men, deformed creatures, and Dr. Tsu and her army of ravishing and leggy assassins are just a few of Harber's many obstacles in this most outlandish tale of delectable and action oriented sights.

Ross Hagen takes on the role of Mike Harber, the quick-witted and unstoppable insurance investigator powerhouse. Ridiculously cocky and abundantly womanizing, Hagen's portrayal of this sure-headed hero is something to witness. Sometimes slick, but mostly accident prone, Hagen gives an interesting performance that is both adrenaline fused and comically silly. The hybrid of sorts makes for some rather entertaining viewing, and his charisma is without a doubt what holds most of these wacky antics together. You can tell that he is having fun with the role and through this whimsical manner, you begin to be infected by the fun of it all. Whether he's toppling down a staircase, being beaten to a pulp by a sexy kung-fu artist, or dishing out some well deserved justice, Ross Hagen makes it all so damn enjoyable and a real treat to witness.

Maria De Aragon steals the show as the ravishing female assassin Linda, whose gorgeous figure and hypnotizing looks literally set the film on fire. She throws herself into this role, as she punches and kicks her way through it like a champ. She may not be the most athletic or accomplished of fighters, but damn does she give a fiery performance that never holds back. Often thrust into a number of action scenes throughout the film, Maria bursts to life in each case, giving the movie a much needed injection of female badassery. I'd have to say that she was an excellent and pitch-perfect femme fatale for the film, leaving Nancy Kwan's Dr. Tsu character in the dust. Like Hagen's role in the film, Maria's presence in this movie is an essential piece to the puzzle and she is one of the glaring reasons on why this feature is so damn enjoyable.

It's the oddities and unusual nature of the movie that really meld well with the entertaining performances of Hagen and Maria. From a child assassin, to a strange skinny oriental mob leader, to a mad surgeon, to an army of sexy killers, to even a handful of deformed beast men, this film has it all, and it's all integrated in a way that truly takes the viewer by surprise. You never quite know what will happen next and that is one of the more enjoyable aspects of the production. Taping into its exploitation roots, the film delivers one crazy set piece after another, until your head begins to spin from the strangeness of it all.

Another odd facet of the movie is the inclusion of cult actor Sid Haig as Dr. Tsu's associate. He exits the movie as mysteriously as he enters, and in the end you really don't know much about his character other than he is a part of the overall scheme that Dr. Tsu has cooking. His disappearance from the film is hilarious, because he literally just vanishes mid sequence. As wacky as it seems for a side character to just fade into obscurity, it fits in perfectly with the overall atmosphere of the production. In a movie filled with lethal babes and an unstoppable ladies man insurance inspector, you really have to throw logic out the window and just sit back and be entertained.

Wonder Women is an unapologetic trip through exploitation action cinema, which derives much of its style from its 60's Eurospy counterparts. Sprinkled with a heavy dose of outlandish humor and unprecedented weirdness, this outstanding gem is one for the record books. From beginning to end, you'll struggle to guess what will happen next and the spontaneous nature of the production is one of its strongest assets. Ross Hagen and Maria De Aragon are exceptionally engaging in their roles with Hagen bringing his charisma in full force and Maria looking absolutely breathtaking as she kicks major ass. Nancy Kwan and Sid Haig do a commendable job with their characters, but the true stars are Hagen and Maria.

In the most simplistic of ways, Wonder Women is a film that is ridiculously off the wall. In the most outstanding of ways, the film manages to pack an enormous amount of weirdness into its quick running time, but without sacrificing the coherent nature of its story. It's wild and inventive, yet it never forgets that above all things, it must entertain. I was highly satisfied with this feature and fortunate enough to come across it when I did, because it truly is a lost gem. If you're a fan of these types of films and enjoy a good old fashion oddity, then give this one a go. Wonder Women is truly a spectacle and it is one that you're not going to want to miss. This film is absolutely.....

Nice...... Shorts?

Microphone check... 1...2....1..2!

What a way to go!

This is romantic and all Bob, but I'm just not into you.

Pull my sexy finger Bitch!

If only there was a way out of this joint.

Give me some skin home-slice.

Sweet Lord Almighty! That's the come hither look!

Someone help the cameraman! I think he's having a heart attack!

So how about that second date?

Looks like someone's a third wheel.

Mike Harber gets caught with his pants down.

What the hell are you weirdos watching?!?!?!

It's a nice zoo you got here. Now where the hell is the exit.

Is this real pleather?

Sid Haig loves his pimp cane.

Bad deformed creature....... BAD!

Peace out homies.

i SPY EUROSPY: Agent Z55 Mission Hong Kong

Agent Z55: Mission Hong Kong

Director: Roberto Bianchi Montero

Year 1965

Agent Z55: Mission Hong Kong, AKA Desperate Mission, is an entertaining Eurospy flick that benefits from its cocky and hot-tempered lead, and the brutal moments in which come into light during the later third of the film. With a standard premise, an unusually calm and eccentric villain, and an imposing muscle-bound enforcer, this spy movie has a great deal to be appreciative of. Lensed in the familiar Eurospy style and steep in lore of its espionage brethren, Mission Hong Kong is an enjoyable entry in the Eurospy canon and one that will put a smile across your face more then a few times, especially if you like bad guys who keep armadillos as a pets. Say what!?!?!

The film begins with the extraction of a prominent nuclear scientist named Prof. Larsen, from a Chinese prison, by the hands of a clan of judo experts and by the planning of Agent Z51. Unfortunately, before Larsen can be transported back to America, Z51 is murdered, leaving the plans for Larsen's ultimate escape to fall to ruins. Hearing the news of Z51's death, the US Secret Service enlists their top man to the case, Robert Manning, AKA Agent Z55. Landing in Hong Kong, Manning must locate the now hidden Prof. Larsen while dishing out a sweet plate of revenge for his fellow fallen agent, but things aren't as easy as they first appear to be. For one thing there is a suspicious pair of locals, Su Ling and the gargantuan To-go, who have an unusual interest in Manning's presence in Hong Kong. There's also the simple fact that Prof. Larsen could be hidden anywhere and Manning has little to nothing to go on. What's a secret agent to do?

German Cobos takes on the role of Robert Manning, the headstrong agent who knows all the tricks in the book. This is my first Cobos Eurospy and I have to say that he did a good job as the lead in this film. I'm only aware of one other spy movie that he was in, Blueprint for a Massacre, so I'll be hunting that one down soon. In Mission Hong Kong, Cobos' Robert Manning is a cocky and confident agent who almost comes off as an asshole most of the time, if it wasn't for his witty smart remarks and playful manner. Like most Eurospy heroes, Agent Z55 has a tendency to get into some action packed scenarios and Cobos does a wonderful job in delivering the fast-paced goods and keeping in step with the genre. His character even has the tendency to go a little overboard while duking it out, as will come painfully clear after Manning burns the face of one of his combatants and sends him crying to his death. What a badass! All in all, I'm impressed with my first introduction to German Cobos and I look forward to seeing more of his work in the future.

As for the rest of the crazy bunch that inhabit this motion picture, Yoko Tani takes on the role of Su Ling. At first her character is a mystery, as Manning has no idea if she is friend or foe, but eventually she comes to side with Z55 and his mission, revealing that she was just a victim of circumstance. On the other side of the coin is Milton Reid who plays the role of To-go, a muscle-bound strongman who couldn't be anymore different from Su Ling if he tried. While Su Ling is small, timid and forced to be a part of a nefarious organization, To-go is a beast of a man and willfully participates in the organizations affairs. Reid fits this villainous mold to perfection and takes every opportunity he can in being a thorn in Manning's side. He's an intimidating presence and his facial features are just icing on the already memorable cinematic cake. The leader of this rag-tag group of characters is a man by the name of Barrow, played by Gianni Rizzo. While many Bond-type villains are given a pet to impose fear into their agents, Barrow is instead given one of the most peculiar of animal sidekicks in the form of an armadillo. I shit you not! The dastardly bastard has an armadillo as a pet. Be that as it may, I have to say that unfortunately for Rizzo, this is probably the most memorable thing about his character.

With any grand Eurospy film, you have stupendous locations and visuals to back that up and with Mission Hong Kong you get that with the abundance of all the picturesque landscapes that Hong Kong has to offer. From the bustling atmosphere of the city to the maze-like wooden structures floating on the harbor, the film has a nice diversity with its locations and uses them to great effect. Though the tradition for most Eurospy flicks is to showcase a great array of international vistas, Z55 is content with just basing its espionage-filled antics in Hong Kong and for this film it works. The mission on display is a much more subtle version then we are used to in this genre and it makes sense to scale back the global aspects of the production to fit the scenario. Still, director Roberto Bianchi Montero makes adequate use of his sprawling locales, giving the production a much more broader feel then it has any right to have.

As for the action of Mission Hong Kong, they haven't forgot it, in fact there is a great deal of interesting set-pieces to be witnessed in this humble production. Manning finds himself battling it out in some rather impressive locations, which give way to a great deal of visually alluring moments that make for an impressionable battleground. For instance Agent Z55 has a shootout in a movie theater where he battles thugs behind a projection screen, he has a hair-raising close call at a construction site at night, and an even more enthralling man to man brawl with To-go in a tanker where Manning shows his more savage and resourceful side. All in all, it's safe to say that as the movie moves along, Agent Z55 becomes more and more brutal and violent, which is always a plus in my book.

Agent Z55: Mission Hong Kong is a respectable Eurospy entry that may not be the most robust of the genre, but it still maintains all of the factors that make us love these kind of flicks. From the get go, we are presented a espionage-filled world that is sparse with globetrotting aspects, but what is kept intact is the formula which has spawned a plethora of like-minded genre films that know exactly what the fans want from this type of entry. Agent Z55 beds the ladies, beats the baddies, and saves the day, just as it should be, and director Roberto Bianchi Montero does an excellent job in making it all an enjoyable affair.

When it comes to German Cobos' performance as the super spy Robert Manning, he really gives it his all and throws himself in to the role. The fights are frantic and physical, the shootouts are ruthless and succinct, and the flirtatious interactions are a plenty. Mission Hong Kong also benefits from a commendable supporting cast of characters like Yoko Tani's Su Ling, Milton Reid's To-go, and the blandly depicted, but strangely hypnotic, armadillo lover Barrow, played by Gianni Rizzo. Combine all of these various elements together and you have yourself Agent Z55: Mission Hong Kong, an interesting Eurospy effort that has all of the things that we crave; action, adventure, and babes. This is one mission that's.....

Pay attention to the road asshole!

Umm... How do I put this? There's a dead hooker in my room.

Peek a boo Manning. I see you!

Look at me when I'm talking to you, you bald FREAK!

Hello there sexy lady.

Staring contest.... GO!

Hold it right there mister.

I'll be using you tonight.

Check out the rack on that hose hound.

Manning's gas problem made for an awkward moment.

I outta pop you right in the mouth!

Come here and give me a big hug!

Once again Manning's gas ruins the day.

How about we heat this motherfucker up?

Is that weird little man still watching us?

Knock it off you two and learn to share.